Access..

 

‘There are lengths I do not expect you to go. Being my friend’s friend does not guarantee you the same level of access to me as he does.’ She said it so boldly and plainly I was impressed. It’s not every day you find someone articulate an idea so well, especially an idea you have been thinking about.

We are seated at the first floor of a restaurant on a sunny Sunday afternoon talking about anything and everything. The conversation drifts towards this topic that I have been trying to find the right words for and she phrased it so well I instantly knew what I’d call this article - ACCESS.

The genesis of all this was when a friend’s friend found us talking and who, after exchanging pleasantries, went ahead and started throwing what he considered to be humorous words. They would probably have had his friends on the floor, but we weren’t his friends. To us he was a stranger making us uncomfortable.  

This got me thinking, how should we act in a new environment? Do we go with our natural selves or wait until everyone else is familiar with our personality? Help me here. How should one behave?

I, personally, think codes of conduct exist for a reason because what you consider harmless might be triggering to someone else and to avoid the risk of harming others, I think it is prudent to only be ‘yourself’ around those who know you. If you find yourself in a new environment, don’t go around throwing tantrums talmbout ‘BuT tHiS iS wHo I aM’ when people get offended by your actions and or words. Learn that not everyone likes your version of doing things and that is okay. Do. Not. Force. It. On. Them.